#2 After the news

Well those of you who have read my first blog & those reading this one need to know it's my first time writing, so please bear with me. This blog is more for me than anything; I am hoping that it will be good to look back on when all the mess is over!

I had my first meeting with my breast specialist the following day after hearing the news. He had performed my previous lumpectomy so I knew him & he is a lovely man with a great bedside manner. (I'm in great hands) He wanted me to have an MRI as my previous Ultra sound & mammograms were not very clear.
So he scheduled the appointment & off I went.

MRI for those who haven’t had the pleasure, is that machine you sometimes see on Television that they insert you into to x-ray (best way to describe) a bit further into your tissue. They inject a dye in you & take lots of pictures. For a breast MRI you lie on your stomach, the machine is very loud with lots of clunking noises. They give you head phones with music, but you can barely hear it. (Was more annoying than anything) I was in the machine for about 30 minutes.

Back to the Doctors. The MRI probably left more questions than answers! Off for further biopsies. URRGGGG............ This time I had to have a mammogram led biopsy, which for those of you who have had a mammogram means they press your breast into a vice & it had to stay there for 40 minutes while they tried to navigate the needle into the area they wanted. (I might add this was the other breast, which had not been identified with cancer) 8 biopsy's later, I felt like a pin cushion. They then tell me I need to have an Ultra sound biopsy on the cancer breast as there were areas of question on the MRI. (According to all these doctors, I was a special case!WTF!) I know I'm special (LOL), but not really what you want to be told in this circumstance. I've had ultra sound biopsies before & they aren't as bad as the mammogram one, or so I thought. On this occasion that was not the case.

I guess I should explain that the reason for MRI & so many biopsy's was due to the fact, that like me, my breast tissue is very dense, apparently more so than most.

So when the doctor performing the biopsy has to put her whole weight into inserting the needle, it is a little worrying & uncomfortable, 6 biopsy's later! Then back to waiting for results...........& wine

As I drove home alone I sobbed... Hadn't really cried much since the first day so I guess I just needed to get it out! Have to say that I felt like I'd been violated & was mentally & physically exhausted when I got home. Look out family I was in a foul mood!

My family have been phenominal. I have two teenage boys who are always asking if I'm okay & if they can do anything. My poor hubby is beside himself, keeping it together (in front of me anyway) running around to all my appointments & taking time off work. My parents happen to be visiting at this time & that was great sometimes, and not so other times. Mum kept saying she would stay on to help, I had to convince her without hurting her feelings that perhaps coming back at a later time would be better. :-(

Back to the specialist......... Well the good news was it was isolated in one breast only! Great! Now what?
Well options for me were lumpectomy & radiation....... OR Mastectomy, breast reconstruction & no further treatment neccessary! Most people would opt for the first option, however my specialist had these concerns;
my dense breast tissue & the difficulty they have detecting changes, he was very concerned that it would come back & not be detected before it spreads. My age was another factor (some consider me young :-) )
The original lump I went in to have tested by the way wasn't the cancer, that was found by accident. My specialist said if it was his wife with all the factors relevant to me he would opt for the mastectomy.

My husband & I went home to think & drink! Wine..........